The Concept of Emotional Intelligence
People started talking about emotional intelligence (EI) relatively recently. Twenty years ago, American psychologists Peter Salovey and John D. Mayer proposed the theory of emotional intelligence, which was later refined and popularized. They defined EI as “the ability to monitor one's own and others' feelings and emotions, to discriminate among them, and to use this information to guide one's thinking and actions” (Salovey & Mayer, 1990).
Perception of Emotions
A person with this kind of intelligence can recognize their own emotions and manage them, as well as identify and manage the emotions of other people. This emotional awareness makes it possible to control one's emotions and use them in line with one's goals, and, when necessary, to help other people do the same.
Assessing and Understanding Emotions People with a high level of emotional intelligence have a clear understanding of what's happening to them at any given moment and are able to analyze their emotional state. They can identify not only their feelings, but also their nuances:
fear – nervousness – anxiety; anger – rage – indignation; shame – guilt – sadness; resentment – irritation – dissatisfaction. Being able to name an emotion helps to manage it better. Thanks to this ability, emotionally intelligent people have self-confidence and a realistic attitude toward their own emotional expressions.
Regulating Emotions
EI helps people successfully regulate the expression of their emotional state, refrain from impulsive actions and hasty decisions, and allows them time to think things through and prepare. This shows up in the ability to lower the intensity of anger or worry, to shift gears, and to raise one's inner and outer mood.
Understanding the Emotional States of Others People who possess these skills are sensitive to others' emotions; they are able to pick up on emotional signals and expressions around them. They find it easy to interact in society and know how to be good friends. Within a family, it's easy for them to be parents, and they build sensitive romantic relationships with their partners. At work, they easily cope with leadership responsibilities and collaborate well with those around them.
Showing Empathy
Another important skill provided by EI is the ability to show empathy. Empathy is the ability to feel compassion or, in other words, the ability to understand or feel what another person is experiencing within their own frame of reference — that is, the ability to put yourself in another person's place.
A person with a high level of emotional intelligence will easily hear and understand the person they're talking to, and will adjust their own emotions to match the other person's mood.
Raising Your Level of Emotional Intelligence
A distinctive feature of EI is that any person, at any age, can improve and raise their level of it, and the technique for developing EI is quite simple. It's important to identify and analyze your emotions in each specific situation. Identifying an emotion helps you understand what a person is actually feeling. The next step is regulating emotions. The ability to pause and think before acting helps strengthen your inner resolve and stand firmly on what is truly valuable to you.
The Importance of Developing Emotional Intelligence
Developing emotional intelligence allows you to respond correctly to various life situations and opens the door to understanding the actions of other people. EI is especially important when stressful situations arise, such as conflicts, unexpected changes, and difficulties.
A high level of EI helps a person take care of themselves and the wellbeing of others, bringing many benefits across many areas of life — from personal happiness and wellbeing to significant success in a professional context.
Liudmyla Betina
